{"id":10124,"date":"2025-02-24T14:57:03","date_gmt":"2025-02-24T18:57:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/parmaks.com\/Resources\/vishens-revolutionary-approach-to-challenging-society-norms\/"},"modified":"2025-02-24T14:57:03","modified_gmt":"2025-02-24T18:57:03","slug":"vishens-revolutionary-approach-to-challenging-society-norms","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/parmaks.com\/Resources\/vishens-revolutionary-approach-to-challenging-society-norms\/","title":{"rendered":"Vishen\u2019s Revolutionary Approach to Challenging Society Norms"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Profit<\/a>
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There\u2019s a good chance your life is ruled by a set of outdated, hand-me-down beliefs. \u201cBrules<\/strong>,\u201d as Vishen<\/strong>, the founder and CEO of Mindvalley, calls them. Short for bullsh*t rules<\/em>.<\/p>\n

Society hands us nonsense rules, and we accept them without question. The \u201cget a real job\u201d brule. The \u201csuccess means suffering\u201d brule. The \u201cdon\u2019t rock the boat\u201d brule. Sound familiar?<\/p>\n

But the fact is, brules aren\u2019t laws. They\u2019re myths wrapped in authority\u2019s clothing.<\/p>\n

And once you see them for what they are, you\u2019ll wonder why you ever obeyed them in the first place.<\/p>\n

What are brules?<\/h2>\n

\u201cBrules\u201d are the unspoken \u201cshoulds\u201d that dictate how you work, love, succeed, and fail. Vishen describes them as the rules we take on \u201cfrom our outside environment, from our culture, our religion, our parents<\/em>.\u201d Even though these limiting beliefs<\/a> are meant to guide us with love, they \u201cactually hold us back<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

But that\u2019s the thing, right? Society loves its rules. They\u2019re neat, they\u2019re orderly, and they keep everyone coloring inside the lines. But every so often, a rule sneaks in that makes no sense.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey are preset definitions of how life should work<\/em>,\u201d Vishen explains in his Mindvalley program, Be Extraordinary<\/em><\/strong>. And for a long time, he followed one of the most common brules: success means following the safest, most logical path.<\/p>\n

For him, that meant being an engineer. \u201cIf you want to be rich, go into computers like Bill Gates<\/em>,\u201d his grandfather told him. So he did. Aced school, got into a top university, and landed a coveted job at Microsoft.<\/p>\n

But while his r\u00e9sum\u00e9 screamed success, his soul was running on empty. So he quit. That led him to Mindvalley, to work that fuels him, to success on his own terms.<\/p>\n

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Brules are the rules that we take on from our outside environment, from our culture, our religion, our parents, even though they mean to guide us with love, but these are the rules that actually hold us back.<\/p>\n

\u2014 Vishen, trainer of Mindvalley\u2019s Be Extraordinary program<\/cite><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

The thing nobody tells you is, following these so-called rules doesn\u2019t necessarily earn you respect. One study found that when you challenge the status quo on purpose, people are more likely to see you as a leader<\/a>, not a rebel without a cause.<\/p>\n

Abraham Lincoln, Richard Branson, Oprah, Malala Yousafzai, Greta Thunberg\u2014there\u2019s no shortage of familiar faces who\u2019ve thrown society\u2019s rulebook into the fire.<\/p>\n

As Vishen says, \u201cThere\u2019s nothing more captivating than a person vibrant with life and passion and pursuing their calling<\/em>.\u201d And when you\u2019re intentional, confident, and aligned with a higher purpose, brules don\u2019t stand a chance.<\/p>\n

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Where do they come from?<\/h3>\n

No one is born believing they must follow societal norms. So where do these brules come from? Vishen names five origins:<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Childhood indoctrination. <\/strong>The beliefs of parents, teachers, and authority figures shape our worldview before we even know we have a choice.<\/li>\n
  2. Authority figures. <\/strong>We absorb ideas from politicians, institutions, and societal leaders, often without questioning their validity.<\/li>\n
  3. The need to belong. <\/strong>People adopt brules to fit in, even when they conflict with personal values.<\/li>\n
  4. Social proof. <\/strong>If \u201ceveryone\u201d does it, we assume it must be right (just check the 1960s\u00a0 cigarette ads).<\/li>\n
  5. Internal insecurities. <\/strong>We assign false meaning to life experiences, creating brules that limit us without even realizing it.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    And that\u2019s the trap\u2014brules become so ingrained that we stop questioning them. They exist for no reason other than \u201cthat\u2019s just how it\u2019s always been<\/em>.\u201d\u00a0<\/p>\n

    \u201cThe problem with brules is that they act as limitators on your true potential<\/em>,\u201d Vishen explains. \u201cBrules really hold you back. They prevent you from success; they prevent you from real happiness; they prevent you from fully expressing yourself and kicking butt in the world<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

    And yet, many of us follow them like gospel, never stopping to ask who made them or whether they even make sense.<\/p>\n

    10 examples of brules<\/h2>\n

    \u201cPsychologists tell us that by the time we\u2019re in our mid-30s, our identity or personality will be completely formed<\/em>,\u201d says Dr. Joe Dispenza in his book, Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself<\/em>.\u00a0<\/p>\n

    By then, much of what we do, believe, and react to isn\u2019t a conscious choice<\/a>; it\u2019s a subconscious program running in the background. Driving a car, brushing our teeth, overeating when we\u2019re stressed\u2026\u00a0<\/p>\n

    That\u2019s exactly how brules take hold: they become subconscious. Like these 10 you\u2019ve probably been following without even realizing it:<\/p>\n

      \n
    1. You need a college degree to be successful.<\/li>\n
    2. Work hard, and success will follow.<\/li>\n
    3. You have to wait for the \u201cright time\u201d to chase your dreams.<\/li>\n
    4. Money is the root of all evil.<\/li>\n
    5. You must stick to one career path.<\/li>\n
    6. Love is painful.<\/li>\n
    7. More hours = more productivity.<\/li>\n
    8. People (or groups of people) are inherently bad.<\/li>\n
    9. You shouldn\u2019t quit. Winners never quit.<\/li>\n
    10. It\u2019s selfish to put yourself first.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

      Keep living by these societal norms, and you\u2019ll continuously reinforce the same patterns. But, as Dr. Dispenza suggests, \u201cIf you want a new outcome, you will have to break the habit of being yourself, and reinvent a new self<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

      So question them, challenge them, rewire them, and your life starts to shift.<\/p>\n

      How brules limit personal growth and what happens when you break free<\/h2>\n

      How many times have you second-guessed yourself? Hesitated before taking a risk? Dismissed a gut feeling?<\/p>\n

      Those are brules at work.<\/p>\n

      \u201cOur internal insecurities make us create brules<\/em>,\u201d Vishen explains. \u201cAnd then we live under these operating systems without realizing that we made it all up<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

      Psychologically, they condition you to shrink. Research shows that the brain prioritizes familiar patterns, even when they hinder self-improvement. The more you obey limiting beliefs, the more your neural pathways reinforce them<\/a>. You don\u2019t even question them anymore; they just become \u201cthe way things are.\u201d<\/p>\n

      \n

      Brules really hold you back. They prevent you from success; they prevent you from real happiness; they prevent you from fully expressing yourself and kicking butt in the world.<\/p>\n

      \u2014 Vishen, trainer of Mindvalley\u2019s Be Extraordinary program<\/cite><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

      And that\u2019s where the real damage happens. They \u201cbox you in<\/em>,\u201d as Vishen points out, and \u201cprevent you from fully expressing yourself and living the life that you want<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

      For instance, only half of U.S. workers feel deeply satisfied with their jobs<\/a> (meaning the other 50% are really not<\/em>). And 55% of unhappy couples remain in marriages<\/a> longer than they should.<\/p>\n

      You choose careers that don\u2019t excite you. Stay in relationships that drain you. Follow paths that were never yours to begin with.<\/p>\n

      But they\u2019re bullsh*t<\/em> for a reason. Which means you can break free<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

      Much like Bobby Crooks<\/a>, a student from the U.S., who realized he had been living on autopilot, chasing success by society\u2019s rules. That is, until personal growth<\/a> helped him redefine his path.<\/p>\n

      Or Grace<\/a>, a writer from the U.K., who walked away from a high-powered government career to build a life on her own terms. She realized that the biggest brule holding her back was the belief that breaking them for herself wasn\u2019t possible.<\/p>\n

      The bottom line is, the moment you see a brule for what it is, you reclaim your empowerment.<\/p>\n

      Vishen\u2019s guide to breaking free from brules<\/h2>\n

      How do you know if a belief is a brule or a rule worth keeping? The answer lies in mindset shifts. And Vishen suggests running it through a simple five-question test.<\/p>\n

      1. Is it based on trust and hope in humanity?<\/h3>\n

      Many brules exist to control, limit, or divide. They thrive on fear\u2014fear of failure, rejection, not fitting in\u2026 But if a belief assumes the worst in people, asks you to distrust others, or promotes scarcity over abundance, it\u2019s worth questioning.<\/p>\n

      Take the brule that people are inherently selfish. We\u2019re told to be cautious, to protect ourselves, to not expect kindness from others. Yet, in Norway and Denmark, many small farms operate on the honor system, leaving fresh produce on unmanned stands with a box for payment (and theft is virtually non-existent).<\/p>\n

      Or consider the belief that strangers can\u2019t be trusted. But studies show that communities rally together in times of crisis<\/a>, such as natural disasters, with people risking their own safety to help others.<\/p>\n

      \u201cExtraordinary minds do not need to seek validation from outside opinion or through the attainment of goals<\/em>,\u201d Vishen points out. \u201cInstead, they are truly at peace with themselves and the world around them. They live fearlessly, immune to criticism or praise, and fueled by their own inner happiness and self-love<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

      The fact of the matter is, real personal transformation starts when you shift from fear-based thinking to trust. Trust in yourself, in your ability to adapt, in the idea that the world is not out to get you\u2014but to support your growth.<\/p>\n

      2. Does it violate the \u201cgolden rule\u201d?<\/h3>\n

      Treat others how you want to be treated. How many times did your parents tell you that growing up?\u00a0<\/p>\n

      Yet, as we enter society, we forget. We judge. Exclude. Suppress. Damn you,<\/em> <\/em><\/strong>brule<\/em>.<\/p>\n

      Look, for instance, at the brule that certain people are \u201cbetter\u201d or \u201cmore deserving\u201d based on status. We respect CEOs but undervalue teachers. We admire wealth but look down on the poor. If we were in different shoes, would we want to be treated the same way?<\/p>\n

      Or consider the brule that politeness means suppressing your voice. People are taught not to challenge authority, not to question unfair treatment, not to \u201crock the boat.\u201d But if the roles were reversed, wouldn\u2019t you want someone to stand up for you?<\/p>\n

      \u201cYour life is not about you<\/em>,\u201d Vishen says. \u201cRather, your life, in the words of Neale Donald Walsch, \u2018is about the lives of everyone else you touch<\/em>.\u2019\u201d<\/p>\n

      At its core, the \u201cgolden rule\u201d of treating others as you want yourself to be treated is about fairness, empathy, and integrity. If a belief doesn\u2019t pass this test, it\u2019s just a brule in disguise.<\/p>\n

      3. Does it serve your happiness?<\/h3>\n

      Work hard, grind through the struggle, and then<\/em>\u2014maybe\u2014you\u2019ll be happy. That\u2019s what many of us are taught.<\/p>\n

      Bullsh*t<\/em>. Research shows that happier people are actually more productive, creative, and successful<\/a>, not the other way around.<\/p>\n

      \u201cIf we define happiness as most people do, as simply the elevated emotion of bliss, then we could create a future in the human race where we take you, we plug you into a machine, we fill you with nonstop blissful chemicals, and your life is complete<\/em>,\u201d Vishen highlights. \u201cThat isn\u2019t really happiness<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

      So why do we keep postponing joy like it\u2019s some kind of reward we have to earn?<\/p>\n

      Look at the people who defy this. The ones who quit their \u201csecure\u201d jobs to do what they love. The ones who prioritize joy over obligation. The ones who don\u2019t let the fear of what\u2019s \u201cpractical\u201d keep them stuck.<\/p>\n

      They aren\u2019t lucky. They just stopped making happiness a future event.<\/p>\n

      Instead, they made it a process\u2014one that comes from adopting a growth mindset<\/a>. As Vishen puts it, \u201cHappiness from growth is one of the most powerful forms of happiness you can get.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

      4. Is it something that you took on because of culture or religion?<\/h3>\n

      Nobody is born believing in brules. They\u2019re handed to us\u2014wrapped in tradition, stamped with authority, and reinforced by generations who never questioned them either.<\/p>\n

      \u201cThe culturescape<\/em>\u201d\u2014collective set of beliefs, norms, values, and rules imposed by society\u2014\u201creally has its grip on you<\/em>,\u201d says Vishen. \u201cYou live your life not often for yourself, but for your parents or your grandparents or your spouse<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

      Take last names. Ever wondered why, in most cultures, women take their husband\u2019s surname? It\u2019s not romance. It\u2019s an outdated relic from when wives were considered property, and a name change marked the \u201ctransfer\u201d from father to husband.<\/p>\n

      And the five-day workweek? An artifact of the Industrial Revolution. The idea that you need to sit in an office from 9 to 5 to be \u201cproductive\u201d is a huge brule designed for factory labor, not modern creativity.<\/p>\n

      As Vishen quotes from another writer, \u201cTradition is nothing more than peer pressure from dead people<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

      The point? Cultural and religious norms aren\u2019t always rooted in logic. Some serve us. Others keep us stuck.<\/p>\n

      5. Is it something that you chose rationally or through imitation?<\/h3>\n

      When was the last time you made a life decision that was truly yours? No, not something you copied from your parents, something your friends were doing. Or anything that felt right simply because it was familiar.<\/p>\n

      Most of what we believe isn\u2019t the result of deep thinking; it\u2019s really social osmosis. We absorb it from family, media, teachers, society. It seeps into our brains unnoticed, until one day we\u2019re living a life we never consciously designed.<\/p>\n

      And once you settle into a belief, it starts to feel like reality. Research shows that social influence can actually change perception itself<\/a>. In other words, if enough people around you believe something, there\u2019s a good chance you\u2019ll believe it too.<\/p>\n

      Look at fashion. In the early 2000s, people walked around in low-rise jeans and Von Dutch trucker hats like that was a good idea. Why? Because they chose it? Or because everyone else was doing it?<\/p>\n

      \u201cWe sometimes take on brules that hold us back because we want to conform so that we can fit in with a particular group of people<\/em>,\u201d Vishen explains. It could be the workplace culture you adopt, the religion you follow, or the traditions of your community. \u201cWhile these groups give us a sense of belonging, some of these groups could have really dangerous brules, and you want to be aware of that<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n

      Now, think about it: if you stripped away imitation, expectation, and autopilot thinking, would you still choose the life you\u2019re living?<\/p>\n

      Unleash your limitless<\/h2>\n

      For years, these brules have run the show. Like a hack playwright feeding you tired lines, convincing you that safety is better than audacity, that struggle is the price of success, that questioning the script is downright improper\u2026<\/p>\n

      But now? You know better. You see the strings. And once you see them, you can cut them.<\/p>\n

      Because the truth is, you weren\u2019t meant to live by someone else\u2019s script. Or to be meek, middling, and marionette-like.<\/p>\n

      You were meant to be audacious<\/em>. Expansive<\/em>. Sovereign over your own bloody life<\/em>.<\/p>\n

      \u201cListen to your soul and break the brules<\/em>,\u201d Vishen says. And in his free Be Extraordinary<\/em> masterclass<\/strong><\/a>, you\u2019ll learn how to do exactly that\u2014by dismantling the beliefs that don\u2019t serve you and rewriting the ones that do.<\/p>\n

      This isn\u2019t self-improvement. It\u2019s self-liberation. A full-scale reclamation of your mind, your potential, and your damn life.<\/p>\n

      Because you\u2019ve spent enough time being docile. Like Lincoln and Branson, Malala and Greta, Bobby and Grace\u2014now, it\u2019s your turn to be extraordinary<\/em>.<\/p>\n

      Welcome in.<\/p>\n<\/p><\/div>\n